And for a moment, for a moment
I am happy....
But when I'm alone
No one hears me cry
I need you to know
I'm not through the night
Some days I'm still fighting to walk towards the light...

Courage by Superchick
----------------------------

You'd be eighteen now, finally a man in the eyes of the world. But I don't think you had ever been a child. To me, even in the times we were laughing, you were too serious, too mature, too old...It was written there in the shadows in your eyes, the remnants of what your father did to you. It was written in the way cancer took the use of your right hand. It was written in your pained smile as you tried to convince us you were all right. The same pained smile you gave us after another attempt to take your own life...
____________________________

So yesterday I had an awesome time with Tiff, John, and Simon at the Visit Day at UMBC. Even though it's not on any of our lists, we decided to go tour it anyway. It was awesome because I got to hang with my best friends...and get lost with them...and walk all over campus in the rain with them...and have a four-way-talking-about-a-lot-stuff jumbled conversations with them. It was fun with a ph- (S/T say it with me: PHYSICS).

And I think I did beast on my AP Chem test today.

Anyway, I'd better get back to keeping my head above water with all the stuff I have to do.

LTRS, yo.

-Mothinksitsweirdyoutriedtotrickherintoth inkingyouhadaboyfriend